Seattle, Washington: A feminist victory has been declared in Seattle today with the creation of a new dating app, CleanSweep. The app is known for its ease of use, sleek design, and its tough stance against men with poor hygiene. Its popularity is due to its unique, new feature: the app instantaneously blocks all men who use 3-in-1 Body Wash.
“Dating is hard enough already,” said app creator and avid feminist, Stacey, 31. “But the last thing any of us want on a date is to learn the man we’re interested in doesn’t know why you can’t just …shampoo and condition your hair at the same time! Hence, I created this app.”
“This new app could prove to be quite an achievement in the advancement of women’s rights,” said Washington State University Women’s Studies Professor Diana Green, 41. “Not only will it improve the lives of women everywhere by encouraging men to use hair products properly, it will be an important topic in our research for years to come. This is very exciting news for all of us here at the department!”
Not everyone was happy with the news, however. “Is this for real?” said university student and Men’s Rights Activist Will, 19. “As if women can actually tell if we use 3-in-1 body wash. I can’t believe this. If women get to have an app that can tell whether we use this product, we should be able to have our own app which tells us what women look like without all their makeup.”